Stories from The Outer Wilds

The Outer Wilds is a great game and you should play it. The following are all true stories.

10/10 Landing

Spend 5 minutes delicately setting intercept course with comet.
Perfect touch down.
Leave capsule.
Forgot to put on space suit.

Intercept Course

Spend a while matching orbit w/ comet.
Intercept.
Land.
Put on suit.
Playing outside on the comet.
“Why is my ship moving?”
Tidal forces have pulled space ship off of planet.
Panic. Jump off planet. Try to catch up to ship.
Trying not to crash into ship, but also being mindful of O2 levels.
Miraculously manage an intercept course. 600m shy of ship with a cozy 10m/s approach.
Ship crashes into sun.
Ohno.

Nice Point Breaks

Landed ship on monsoon planet. Venus-ish/Neptune-ish. Constant cyclones and storms.
Hop out of ship to investigate.
Fall like an idiot off of my crappy landing spot to the surface.
Survive. Finish investigation.
“How TF am I going to get back up?”
Gravity is too strong to use jetpack.
Idea: These enormous updrafts sweep across the planet and throw stuff into the atmosphere.
Wait for one to throw me and my ship into the upper atmosphere along with my ship. Short flight in 0G.
What could go wrong?
Cyclone arrives.
I am yote.
Hit by entire island hidden in updraft.